Stay
I've been thinking a lot about "staying" because lately I've wanted to run. Run for the hills on many different parts of my life: family, friends, work, all sorts of relationships, my health, my mind, my yoga practice. All of it. All of it I've deeply thought about leaving it somehow.
Especially when things don't feel good, when things feel and are hard, when things feel weird, when you don't want to be "in it" any more, when you feel vulnerable...the list can go on.
And this is where the work kicks in. To stay in it is hard. Been relying on a shaky faith that it'll work out. Trusting some process. Relying on everything that I've read, learned, heard and felt. Digging deep and holding on.
And man, that space has been the hardest. The last two months have been deeply challenging for me. And every single morning in that time, when my alarm has gone off, I've screamed into my pillow with a whimper and then in the next breath, I tell myself that it'll be ok. I tell myself that I am strong enough for another day. Just one more day, get through it. And each day, it compounds a bit and every time I stay in it and actually show up, I can feel that growth.
While visiting family in Canada this past week, I STAYED and not only that, I SHOWED up. That was where things turned around for me. {I also listened and read Marianne Williamson, Brene Brown, & Joseph Campbell!}
I was there, present and in full attention of those who needed me and although it was hard because people are sick, people are hurt, people are vulnerable, I had enough strength to hold space for them and that gave me strength to move forward with more power. We just need enough for another day. This is being fully present.
“Sometimes the bravest and most important thing you can do is just show up.” -Brene Brown
Can you see where you tend to leave? Where can you stay and linger in?