Pain: Your Greatest Teacher

Antonio Banderas was on a show last night talking about how the heart attack he had a few years ago made him adjust his priorities in life right after it. One nurse told him that, “you will come out different, and you will learn something beautiful about this…”

And he did. A heart attack, although different in that it’s a full physical manifestation of pain that needs immediate attention (and/or can cause death), can still be lightly lumped together to our painful, mental anguish and other kinds of real physical-but-not-as-acute-pain pains. He speaks openly now about how his heart attack was a blessing. 

I experienced something similar in my 2015 motor accident and in 2012 when breaking away from job and relationship to teach wellness. In the car accident, the immediate pain and how I survived brought about a clarity that only something as intense as that can do. And in the other instance, I had to follow my gut to guide me forward as I felt a lot of unease and pain leading up to the actual change. The clarity of that latter shift for me shows up in waves and in periods of my life now. It’s very much a reverberation through time.

Overall, as a human species, we’re so pain averse that we’ll do anything not feel it - even if it’s sitting so heavy on our chest and obvious to ourselves and any outsider that things could be different with a few small changes/shifts.

We go to great extremes to numb the pain with things like drink, smoke, shop, eat, sex and more. But it soon again shows up after the drug of choice has worn off. 

Pain is the truthful teacher we don’t want to acknowledge - at least at the outset - especially if we have the choice (Antonio didn’t really have a choice). Pain becomes the teacher because when things feel so intense or you’re experiencing deep pain, you’re being told to shift gears and to change your path. Being alerted to deal with something in our lives that needs immediate attention. And by paying attention and shifting gears, we can somehow - maybe slowly or speedily - ease or totally stop the pain.

But that’s where the shit hits the fan. Because being honest with yourself and then letting go of the things that are not working is hard to do. It’s true work because you’re being asked by YOU to change what needs changing. That takes noticing and listening to you. 

Yes, you.

When you pay attention to what is causing pain, you have to be smart in assessing what you can do about it. You have to be creative with how you can get yourself out of that place and into a new space. 

The one good thing - of many things - is as a human, we’ve all been in that pain of needing to change something. Over time, we know that getting past this literal pain point is our way through. Sometimes it takes longer to fully realize it but we hopefully all come around. We become sick of ourselves playing the victim and we become sick with real physical symptoms. Because when the mind is in suffering the body follows suit with illnesses. I’ll assume that when Antonio said he shifted his priorities, he had other internal work that he was woken up to. There’s a rupture in our inner core when faced with mortality.

Here’s the thing, life has a lot of painful moments in it. And the one thing we all do over and over again is think that the next time we’re faced with it is think that the pain is too tremendous to deal with. And to be truthful, it always feel that way - in the moment. Trust me, I don’t want to feel it either! But when we accept that pain is a part of life, we can move toward it with a little bit more ease…maybe?!

The greatest pains of our lives have been our greatest teachings. With enough time, you see that that was needed in order for you to wake up and change. And if you take a look at the history of humans making it work through some very intense hardships, they’ve usually come out on top more so after they went through what they went through. Becoming more stronger and more grounded.

Pain makes you see a new perspective. One that wouldn’t have happened otherwise. 

Don’t be afraid of pain. It truly is your greatest teacher. So instead of distracting yourself or doing things to numb what needs attention, become attuned to what needs a shift.

Dig deep and find the courage to listen to you.

We all have the ability to get ourselves out of that place of pain and suffering and into a place of love, overabundance, and thriving healing!